and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
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