In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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