She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Randomize
