If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
