Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
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