you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
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