Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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