Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Randomize
