Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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