I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
