Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
