if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
someone threw a dead crab at me
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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