I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
