Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize