5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
