i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize
