I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
