Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Randomize
