Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
