lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
