It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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