and you said cock pushups were impossible
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
