He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
