Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize