i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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