I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
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