would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize
