i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
