I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
They have beer where we have blood.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
