i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
