All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
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