I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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