So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Randomize
