the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
