I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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