Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Randomize
