i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Randomize