Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
