I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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