Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
