Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
