I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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