It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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