Dual....:-)
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
