why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize