I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
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