you guys were way drunker than both of me
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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