just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
