idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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