You're completely useless in the revolution.
another moral hangover. fuck.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize