considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Randomize
